Blood is Thicker Than Water

There was a day when obasanjo visited University of Ibadan Zoo.I was at Ibadan then with my friends,when i saw obasanjo and Stella playing with the animals in the zoo.Mrs Stella then threw a bunch of banana to a monkey,and the monkey rejected it.She was a little bit flabbergasted and threw another one again,then the monkey rejected it again.Obasanjo was furious and asked Stella to bring the remainig bunches of banana.As obasanjo threw the banana to the monkeys,they rushed it and ate it all.Stella was confused and asked the monkey the reason for Rejecting her own bunch of the banana.Do you know what the monkey said: HAHAHAHAHA DONT YOU KNOW BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER.

The poisoned Drink

Ola was in a bar,sitting over his beer and looking very distressed.just then, another man walked in and drank Ola's beer.Ola fell on the ground and started crying uncontrollably and the following conversation ensued between them.
Man(suprised):why are u crying over a bottle of beer?dont worry i'll get u another one
Ola: u dont understand
I was woken up by robbers this morning who stripped me off all my life savings
I took this in good fate, and dressed up to work.on my way, i was hit by a vehicle,i still managed to get to work only to discover that i have been sacked.
Here, i am now to end my miserable life with a poisoned drink, u come from no where to drink it!
Just then the man fainted

The poisoned Drink

Fascinating Little Johnny!

A teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.

Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating."

The teacher said, "That was good, Mary, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"

Sally raised her hand and said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated."

The teacher said, "Good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"

Little Johnny raised his hand.
The teacher hesitated because Johnny was notorious for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate," so she called on him.

Johnny said loudly, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons."
The teacher said, "That was good, Johnny. However, you did not use the word 'fascinate' in your sentence."

Little Johnny continued, "But her boobs are so big, she can only fasten eight!"

Wenger Keen on keeping Van Persie

Despite the Dutchman's refusal to go on tour with the Gunners, the club's French boss is still hopeful "one of the best strikers in the world" will remain at the Emirates

 Arsene Wenger has repeated his determination to ensure his wantaway captain Robin van Persie remains an Arsenal player.

 The Dutchman, last season’s Premier League top goalscorer, released a statement earlier this summer in which he indicated he was unwilling to sign an extension to his contract that is due to expire next summer.

Manchester City, Manchester United and Juventus are all monitoring the 29-year-old’s position but Wenger, who is expected to confirm a lack of fitness as the reason for his captain’s failure to take part in the club’s pre-season tour of Asia, believes he will succeed in ensuring Van Persie remains in north London.

“For me, Van Persie is one of the best strikers in the world, if not the best, and my desire is to keep him at the Club.” he told Arsenal’s official website.

“As for the rest I will do what is in the best interests of Arsenal Football Club. That, at the moment, is where we are. There is not a lot more to say than that.”

The uncertainty that surrounds Van Persie’s future is threatening to undermine Arsenal’s build-up to the new campaign, as was the case last year when the transfer sagas of Samir Nasri and Cesc Fabregas cast a cloud over the club, and Wenger is aware of the need to avoid a repeat scenario.

Wenger added: “Robin was an exceptional leader last year. But we know how much we had to fight to come third because we missed out the start of the season. After seven games we had lost four and we have learned that for us it is vital for us to focus on the start of the season rather than on any transfers.

“If the transfers happen, they happen. As long as you are at the club you give your best for the club and that is the only pride you can have as a football player and as a manager.

“As long as you are somewhere you give your best every day for that club. If it changes, it changes. I am convinced that Robin is like that, he is completely focused every day on his job. He loves football, he loves the game and as long as he is here he will do that.”

Her Excellency Wants Presidents’ Wives Roles Included In Constitution

Patience Jonathan, has canvassed for the inclusion of roles of presidents’ wives in the Constitution.

This, according to Patience Jonathan would enable them get retirement benefits along with their spouses when they leave office.
Patience Jonathan made the plea in a chat with journalists shortly after she was sworn-in as Permanent Secretary in the Bayelsa State Civil Service along with 18 others by Governor Seriake Dickson on Friday afternoon.
Patience Jonathan lamented that the office of the First Lady is not currently recognized because it is not in the Constitution, saying its inclusion will “enable the occupier of that position to enjoy benefits of the office like their husbands on retirement.”
Patience Jonathan recalled a situation when the Governor of Lagos State, Mr. Babatunde Fashola (SAN)   prevailed on the president to call her to order because the role of the first lady is not in the Constitution.
Patience Jonathan tasked the Constitution Amendment Committee to look into the issue with a view to including it in the next constitution.
“We the wives of political office holders, if our names are not in the constitution and our husbands retire with benefits, the Constitution amendment committee should also look into the issue of wives of political appointees.
“We should be included in the Constitution so that we too can retire with benefits. With that we can enjoy our career, “Patience Jonathan added.
In his address, Governor Dickson, warned the new permanent secretaries against involvement in politics, saying “we don’t want your involvement in politics; we don’t want to hear that any permanent secretary is involved in the act of politicizing our People.”

Nse Etim “I Grew Up Befriending Animals Because My Parents Were too Busy”

Nollywood actress, Nse Etim, speaks with ADEMOLA OLONILUA about her career and sundry matters

My hairstyle

Nse Etim: I don’t wear dreadlocks, it is just my natural hair that you are seeing. I twist it and loose it when I choose to. I do not fix a weave-on because it is artificial. I carry my hair most of the time, except when I have to attach something else to it. If I am playing a role in a home video film, I wear another hairstyle. I am an easy-going person, though I am inclined to lose my temper sometimes. My bark is worse than my bite and I am a simple person.

Life after graduation

Nse Etim: After graduating from the University of Calabar, I worked with a radio station and a television station. I did a bit of film acting before getting a job in a bank.

Why I quit banking

Nse Etim: I don’t think I remember the year I quit banking. But when I decided it was not longer what I wanted to do I had to leave. I was doing the same thing everyday. I was not passionate about it and I think if you want to earn a living, you should be passionate about what you do.
How I became an actress
Nse Etim: A movie producer, Emem Isong, brought a script to me and asked me to read it. Initially I wasn’t enthusiastic about it, but she insisted and I eventually did it. I decided to start a career as an actress after I took part in the movie titled, Guilty Pleasures. That was my turning point. I owe this to movie fans. They made me who I am today.
My parents’ reaction
Nse Etim: When I decided to be an actress, I was old enough to choose for myself. But my mother only hoped it would work. Now she is my greatest fan. When I say I was rebellious, I mean that I was assertive as a child. I knew what you wanted and went for it. That is how I was brought up:  to know what I want. My mum did not think it was right. So I left acting and went into banking. When I got out, I said to her: now that I have  done your wish, let me do mine.

Most challenging movie

Nse Etim: Honestly I haven’t found any movie that I’d describe as most challenging for me. Also, no role has been insurmountable to me.

Nollywood

Nse Etim: I am an ardent fan of Nollywood. I think it is still developing. We are trying our best to keep it alive, considering the fact that we work under difficult conditions. We hope it will get better some day.

Challenges facing Nollywood

Nse Etim: The greatest challenge is, perhaps, the environment. There are no good roads and there is irregular power supply. Basically, we are suffering in order to put smiles on the faces of the people. In terms of infrastructure, I think we are doing our best, too. We are struggling to succeed in spite of the odds.

Why I lived with my godmother

Nse Etim: Since my parents were very busy when I was much younger, I had to live with my godmother. My mother was still in school and my father had a busy work schedule at the time. But my godmother was not too busy for me. We were quite close. Apart from the neighbour’s son who was my friend, the other friends I had were animals. That was how I grew up. I never felt lonely all that while.

Growing up in the North

Nse Etim: I grew up in the North. Life was beautiful then. Kaduna had lovely hotels where we used to go and swim. Zaria was peaceful and the residents were friendly. Jos had the best yoghurt in the country at that time. As a child, I loved to take yoghurt. Today, I doubt if you could find any that is as tasteful as what we used to buy in those days. Now you have to go all the way to a big store to buy bread. And then, everything in the North just changed.

The crisis in the North

Nse Etim: It is just heart breaking. I think Nigeria is passing through a phase. Some people have said that for the land to be cleansed, blood will have to be shed. I think that is selfish. I do not want my blood to be shed. This is not the way to solve problems. It is painful that we resort to violence to get things done in this country. I hope that the problems in the North will be solved soon.

My most embarrassing moment

Nse Etim: My most embarrassing moment is the day fell off an airplane. I did not remove my glasses and everything went misty. I fell down when I was descending the staircase. The worst part was that I had to struggle to get up on my feet.

My relationships

Nse Etim: I am not involved in a relationship. I don’t think that everybody needs a companion. Lonely people ought to keep themselves occupied with work or they would be bored to death. When I don’t have any work to do, I read books to keep my mind busy. If I don’t have any book to read, I watch a movie or get busy in the kitchen.

 

 

 

Tonto Dike Blasts Ini Edo: Calls Her Nollywood Old Desperate Cargo!

Remember the Arik Airline award In November 2011, that even Rita Dominic and Stella Dimoko Korkus of Encomium magagazine have to come out on twitter and shout of how Ini Edo manipulates her online votes  for the Arik Airline award category for ‘best actress’ during the African International Film Festival …

The nominees for the 2012 Future Awards Actor of the Year are:
Ini Edo, Tonto Dike, OC Ukeje, Ivie Okujaye, Gideon Okeke, Ramman Hassan, Kabirah Mojisola Kafidipe, and Lala Akindoju.